Meeting mating cheating online dating pdf
Rachel was young and beautiful, and I’d found her after signing up on a couple dating sites and dating just a few people.” Having met Rachel so easily online, he felt confident that, if he became single again, he could always meet someone else.
It didn’t seem like there was going to be much of a mourning period, where you stare at your wall thinking you’re destined to be alone and all that.
I was eager to see what else was out there.”of online dating are clear: the Internet makes it easier for single people to meet other single people with whom they might be compatible, raising the bar for what they consider a good relationship.
Before long, his new relationship fell into that familiar pattern.
“I’ve never been able to make a girl feel like she was the most important thing in my life,” he says.
At that point in my life, I would’ve overlooked everything else and done whatever it took to make things work.
“It’s always ‘I wish I was as important as the basketball game or the concert.’ ” An only child, Jacob tended to make plans by negotiation: if his girlfriend would watch the game with him, he’d go hiking with her.He was passive in their arguments, hoping to avoid confrontation.
In Portland, by contrast, most of his friends were in long-term relationships with people they’d met in college, and were contemplating marriage.on the East Coast and spending a few years bouncing around, Jacob moved back to his native Oregon, settling in Portland.Almost immediately, he was surprised by the difficulty he had meeting women.Whatever the flaws in their relationship, he told himself, being with her was better than being single in Portland again. Now in his early 30s, Jacob felt he had no idea how to make a relationship work. Would permanence simply happen, or would he have to choose it? All of a sudden I was going out with one or two very pretty, ambitious women a week. They dated for a few months, and then she moved in.Around this time, he signed up for two online dating sites: Match.com, a paid site, because he’d seen the TV ads; and Plenty of Fish, a free site he’d heard about around town. At first I just thought it was some kind of weird lucky streak.” After six weeks, Jacob met a 22-year-old named Rachel, whose youth and good looks he says reinvigorated him. (Both names have been changed for anonymity.) Rachel didn’t mind Jacob’s sports addiction, and enjoyed going to concerts with him. She was from a blue-collar military background; he came from doctors.“I went from being someone who thought of finding someone as this monumental challenge, to being much more relaxed and confident about it.